In this episode, we have Sean Lazio back into the show to talk about his biggest shift that he had to make – which is selling his gym.
Sean’s Various Identity Shifts
Ben: What was that identity shift like for you?
Sean: It was, it is still, it is by far the biggest identity change to date. I mean, even from high school to the military, military to coming out and then go to school and then starting at school and becoming a business owner like this is by far, I mean, it's been the last seven years of my life. Like this has been my adult life. So for me to shift that identity, cause it was already a massive shift to go from veteran to a business owner and coach to now all the years that I've put in to that and then shifting away from it is by far the biggest it's to date, the biggest shift that I've had to make.
Ben: So what was that first identity shift of becoming a gym owner?
Sean: That was really a bumpy for a couple of years. I'd never actually considered myself a business owner because I had a negative story about businessmen. I just didn't say it. That was just like I own agym and I coach, but it was never like, Oh yeah, I'm a business owner. Like it took me a few years to really sit with that and realize that I had a story around businesspeople and I thought they were all evil on this tie directly into my relationship with money as well, So a few years for that. And before I really start to step into it, and then it wasn't until year five, between five and six when I finally started to identify it as the owner and start delegating even like, I wore all the hats for the first five to five and a half years and the only help that I got was when I hit rock bottom.
And there was just a nice people around me that wanted to help pick me back up, like, Hey, I can cover a class. And you know, from there it turned into like, Oh, I can do this thing where I have people that work for me.
Getting Introduced To Training Camp For The Soul
Ben: What was your inner monologue when you were in the I have to do this all by myself mindset.
Sean: Oh, its just what I knew. I had the awareness around limiting beliefs and stories was non-existent I just That. That was like, for me I'm, you know, I trace this back to, even as a kid, like a young young kid, you know, even in schooling, by the time I had about fourth or fifth grade, like my parents couldn't help me with most of my schoolwork. I was in advanced classes and the level of math that I was at going into like sixth or seventh grade was more than either one of my parents had ever taken.
And I have an older brother who him and I didn't really bond until right before join the military. So yeah, I just sat a lot with like, okay, well I have to do this. And then it just turned into like, well I've got to do it by myself and nobody can do it as good as I can. So I'll just do it by myself, even if I don't have too. So that, that was, that was a normal for me.
It wasn't even until I got introduced to the Training Camp For the Soul and this idea that we can learn a tendencies and beliefs growing up just from watching or observing or feeling it from our parents. And it just, it was a smack across the face of like, Oh man, this business is slowly killing me and I never, and I say that consciously not as in it was a bad thing, it was just, it was draining lifeforce from me and I didn't know how to replenish it. And you know, so delegating was one of the easiest things that I could do
Ben: What got you realize that I can delegate all of these things?
Sean: Training Camp For The Soul. That made me really aware and then a going into The Strong Coach, hands down, just meeting other business owners and talking with Mike and then Danny, and then 'cause, that was at that point I had a couple of people helping coach one was mainly like my earliest morning coach, which I'm super grateful for because even just that allowed me to get a little bit of sleep and just having that extra hour to sleep was it was huge. And then going through the Strong Coach and realizing that if I wanted the business to grow, I had to get out of the way. And part of getting out of the way it was other people I had to step in and fill, fill some shoes.
And so the easiest one for me at that point, it was just like, Oh cool, coaching. I can get people in here to coach. I had enough, I've had enough interest from those around me that were members or just friends of mine that I just vibe with very well and have been around long enough and were already picking up on all the little things.
Ben: it is a key point to bring up of when you become your gym when you become the face of your gym. I imagine there's a lot of other coaches who want that – they're opening a gym because they think that's what they want. And they only see the customer facing side of that. They don't see what's going on behind the scenes. If you take that large of a role in your gym and try and take on it that much responsibility.
I only gain clarity now seven years in and a really locking down on the decision to leave and sell did I find the role that I was stepping into that I had created without even knowing it. And so early on I lost a friend because the gym was offered to me and he had a dream of opening up a gym. And so he caught wind of the gym being sold and he really wanted it. He was friends with the other guy and he legitimately thought that he was going to get it and the conversation never happened.
And then, you know, a month later they find out that I'm getting it and everything was great at first and then they broke off within months and, you know, tried to start their own thing. You know, it didn't make it a year. So yeah, I mean, I do imagine a lot of people get it into this space thinking that that this is going to fill their cup and it does in many ways and it definitely filled my cup in many ways.
Doing the solo venture in a brick-and-mortar gym, it's, it's asking for a lot and if they do not have the tools or they're not equipped enough like me. I mean my story from where I started to where I am, Now like, if you were to read it on paper, I imagine most people I'd be like, Oh yeah, this guy, doesn’t deserve a gym or like how could he have gone from a to B with that background? You know, other than people might hear that, Oh, he's in the military. The military is great and, and teach us a lot of things. They didn’t teach you about business. And it just is what it does teach and reinforces that I can put my head down and continue moving forward. And that got me through a lot of things. And it also dug a lot of holes and emptied my cup real quick. But for me personally, that it wasn't even on the radar. There was never this O I'm the guy, you know, you know, like the first time.
Living The Life That You Want
Ben: That's key in living the life that you want to live is it starts by taking the actions that reflect that life. Like it's, you don't just wait for it to happen. You see the opportunity and you take it.
Sean: I just had this conversation a few days ago with a friend of ours who’s also graduate of the program and she asks, how was your weekend? What's going on? And was like, you know, it was great. And I made this decision that regardless of the business sales, that I was going to travel for the next couple of months and you know, she asked like, that's amazing. Like what made you finally come to that decision? And it just hit me. I'm like the life that I want to live is an in Michigan, it's not with my gym anymore. So why would I continue to put myself there? If it's if it's not filling up my cup and it's not fulfilling.
And if anything, it's more of a draining thing for me now. And it's not because of the business or the people like I, I legitimately loved my job and I still do. And I love Coaching. It was just that my heart was like, dude, we need out. So I was like, okay, I had a choice. I can continue living the way that I was or I could just make the decision that I know the next step for me is somewhere away from Michigan and out West somewhere in the mountains and I had the opportunity to do it and where I would have passed up on those opportunities before, except for, you know, every now and then it just became crystal clear. .
If you want to live the life you want to live, you have to take the actions that are on the alignment with the life you want to live. And I was like, Oh my God, I finally get it. And here we are.
Ben: You've now gone from having security with the gym to selling them in the gym to open-ended creation. I mean from what you've said, you've sold the gym at a price point where you can be fine to not do anything for a couple of months. Wwhat's it like to, to step into that no man's land?
Oh man. It is it's exhilarating. It it's so new to me. I had never been in a position that are like that before. And you know, this story that initially popped up was like this as scary and you know it mentally. So like, hell yeah. There's a part of me that was afraid. Like, ah, I mean, cause there is nothing lined up. There's not a job. It's not like, Hey, in October, we're going to start this job. Or Hey, in September we are going to start this thing up. It's like now I don't know. I have no idea of what’s next
I just know it's not in Michigan. And I know it's not with my gym. And I have a, I've really stepped into this identity of someone who sees fear as a means of direction. And then by means of direction. I mean like Intuit instead of a way from it. And so when that feeling comes up, I'm able to actually gain awareness around it and acknowledge it and sit and be with it and realize that I know that if I make the commitment, like the legit commitment to what my heart wants and I got really clear on that, like I know it's going to work out.
So I'm in this crazy limbo stage of – there's nothing there. And at the same time, like I'm, I am present as if there is something there and that's something there is just not clear yet. And so I'm standing in the unknown and I am totally okay with that.
If you are saying to yourself, I think I should probably make me quit. My job, take all that out. I want to quit. My job is what's left. If you continue to get pulled in the direction, away from what you're currently doing and it's the doubts in the fears that are coming up, do it. This is a great question that, that I love to ask. If you do nothing in your current situation and you find yourself in that situation, what's the cost? What are you, what are you giving up or potentially adding to yourself or staying in by doing nothing like what's that going to cost you?